My coloring book

Photo taken from: http://www.art-is-fun.com/free-abstract-coloring-page.html

Life without emotion would be like having a coloring book without any color.  It would seem simply boring, mundane, and overall unbearable.  Yes, any good coloring book has some great designs and perhaps some beautiful images, but color must be added.

As I allow emotions to color my world, I find life to be filled to the brim with excitement, last minute deadlines, frustration, happiness, sadness, and everything in between.  For most of my life, I have colored my life as the equivalent of a toddler with a book.  No matter what the lines said around me, I was intent on scribbling green all over one page and red all over another until a feeling faded and I went onto the next one.

It made for a life filled with color but not always the easiest to manage.  Sometimes I would get stuck on one color, despite having a whole array of colors to use.  That being said, I am learning!

I am learning that while emotions are fun and definitely add splashes to life - they do not define life.  The challenging emotions or even downright awful emotions that come at times help me become aware of my thoughts and feelings on a situation but the emotions do not get to do all the choosing of how I will act or continue feeling.  Why in the world would I just grab at the first crayon that jumps out of a box to use, when there are so many choices?  As an artist and daughter of the most High God who has an ability to think, navigate, and create, shouldn't I choose which colors to use?  Shouldn't I decide where, how, and for what purpose to use them? Absolutely, which is why an emotion that arises does not simply get to rule the moment, instead it must be considered, tested, and controlled.  Trouble is, I'm not sure where the colors belong all the time.  Other times, I'm longing to use a pretty pink crayon but find only broken up blue crayons in my box.  The good Lord helps me find the appropriate crayon or teaches me which one to use and together this disorderly scene turns into absolute beauty.  I still don't always color in the lines but I also don't color strictly sporadically, instead I live a life that has purpose, meaning, and order.  Or at least, that's what I intend.

Together, the Lord and I are making this little life beautiful one page at a time.  As for the pages I've screwed up, mysteriously His beauty and grace makes even those pages look great.  One day this book will be complete and what will be definitive will not be the strayed lines or the pages full of scribbles - but instead the story of His grace will be whispered across each page.  I am an artist, but He is the master artist, and His story will be told.